Friday, October 17, 2014

I gave up; chocolate

I gave up, and I'm not sorry. 

In theory it would have been easy to write 31 posts about comfort food.  I have so many ideas.  In fact, it would have been easy to write three or four posts a day and have them pre-scheduled to appear - for example, during the weekend we're traveling to a friend's wedding.  (Note that that has not happened yet.) 

But these good intentions were displaced when I realized that I have ebola I apparently just don't care enough. 

There's no point making elaborate apologies for my failures to post things on this blog.  It's not like I have a giant readership that would be really sad if I stopped writing.  Heck, people who do have a significant readership go into radio silence for far longer than I have.  Granted I was supposed to write 31 of them, but I've already published, what, eight posts this month?  That's not bad!  Especially if you want to read about food.  (It's not necessary to respond to that.) 

But, I do have a (very small) consolation prize. 

Remember when I wrote that I (accidentally) discovered a way to make super-dark chocolate ice cream that didn't even require an ice cream maker for churning? 

That was really good ice cream.  If you recall, the point was basically that it was so thick it was a solid at refrigerator temperature; therefore, it could not be churned.  And that viscosity came from the extremely high fat content, so it was fairly creamy when frozen.  However, churning does add a certain je ne sais quoi to the texture of ice cream - specifically, it makes it creamier.  (OK, so, I do know quoi.) 

Since that time, I have been on a bit of a mission to figure out how to make ice cream that has the same flavor (namely, uses Baker's chocolate instead of semi-sweet or even dark chocolate), but doesn't come out so thick it can't be churned.  I was concerned that dropping the fat content too low would take me back into the low-budget ice cream territory where it's no problem to churn the stuff, but it isn't entirely worth eating anyway, because it's more like ice milk.  (No offense, but that's an inferior product.  No point making something that costs $10-12 per half gallon in ingredients if it's not totally decadent.) 

Anyway, I've done some (tasty) trial and error, and I think I have the proportions down. 

So without further ado...a super-outrageously-chocolate-y ice cream recipe you can actually get into the ice cream maker. 

Start with

2 4-ounce bars of Baker's chocolate (the zero-sugar baking chocolate stuff)

and beat them persistently with a hammer before ever removing them from the package.  Pour out of the package into a Pyrex-type bowl and add

1 cup of heavy whipping cream

and put the bowl in the microwave for two minutes on high (YMicrowaveMV).  Meanwhile, pour two cups of 2% milk into a 2-quart (or similar) saucepan and put it on low heat.  Then, separate

6 egg yolks

(reserving the whites for another recipe) and mix them with

1 1/4 cups of sugar

with a fork.  Fetch the chocolate out of the microwave and stir gently with a spatula until homogenous.  Turn off the heat under the milk before it gets to (let alone past) simmering.  Add portions of first the chocolate and then the milk to the eggs, stirring thoroughly after each addition, until entirely combined. 

Pour the entire mixture back into the saucepan and set over low heat, stirring frequently, until the mixture has a ring of tiny bubbles and begins to steam visibly (it will also noticeably thicken).  Then add

1-2 teaspoons vanilla extract

Stir, then put the whole mixture in the fridge for 8 hours or until it has become well and truly as cold as the refrigerator.  At that time, you can feed it through your ice cream maker according to the manufacturer's instructions.  Note that my ice cream maker (the KitchenAid attachment) requires freezing the "freeze bowl" for at least 15 hours before use, so if yours is similarly picky you actually want to start that part of the process first.  After churning, put the mixture in the freezer for about three hours before first serving.  Enjoy! 


  1. No apologies necessary. :) It's your blog, and it takes an awful lot of effort to post something for 31 days in a row!! I bow to you for even attempting it. For what it's worth, I have enjoyed the food posts you did write & publish -- thank you. :)

  2. Yum! Thanks for recipe. I know I haven't commented in forever, but I would miss you if you left!!!!