Tuesday, January 5, 2010

life

So there are only two female attorneys in my office (it's a small office though). My colleague has been mentioning ttc for about a year, but she and her hubbie weren't very focused about it. Since her mom just died, they've been charting, I think - for two months. She let me know today that she's going to get her second blood test - she's had two positive HPTs. Without revealing all the sources of my extensive information, I was able to tell her confidently that with two BFPs, unless she was on HCG, she doesn't really need that second blood test. (She's 5.5 weeks along.) So that's...something...

It's not like I'm getting pregnant in 2010. If I did, having both gals expecting would be sort of weird in the office, but I guess that was always possible, given that I knew she was trying. (And always more likely in her case. I know these things...) I'm not upset, I guess. In fact, I was excited for her. It's always mixed, of course, and I know there are days it may be hard to listen to things. But I have an office with a door :).

And I know she's really worried about her weight, even about preeclampsia or however you spell it? She's concerned that she won't have an opportunity to get to a healthy weight now and she really wanted to. As always, there are always difficulties all around.

She also mentioned her concern that she didn't have enough leave saved up, and had just spent a lot over Christmas. And I realized that for the first time - because I've been saving my leave for years, thinking of maternity leave - I still want to bankroll enough to have some saved each year (I think this way with everything), but I don't want to save it all. I want to spend it. I'm looking forward to going to Vienna (Austria, not Virginia) with my husband and some friends in May. I'm looking forward to spending some time at the monastery in the summer, with my husband's family. I'm looking forward to next Christmas (already!). I'm looking forward to getting to take a day or two off when my mother visits in the spring (I hope).

I don't need to save every penny and hour for an elusive future. I'm going to have a happy life. Or else.

8 comments:

  1. I am jumping out of my seat. I initally hated Vienna, but have come to love it. I do have a travel tip or two, which I will have to get together. (So exciting!! and May is gorgeous.)

    I wouldn't discouage your co-worker from getting the beta done. There are so many people for whom betas don't double and I would prefer to know rather than get hit with the m/c unprepared - but that just a personal preference.

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  2. Wow..that is so awesome that you have been able to be her little "confidant" through this new and exciting time for her. It just amazes me how many people get pregant so easily. It's almost as if when they started charting...they got pregnant. That's cool. Anways...I hope you can remain being strong for her(or maybe she'll become compassionate about your own journey and she ease up on talking about her own pg). I could probably do it too but then save my silent suffering for when I'm home. I'm sure when I become a teacher I will face lots of pregnancies...Lord help me (and you)!!!! :)

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  3. There are very few (read: four, including myself) women at my school. One of them got pregnant BY ACCIDENT and had her baby on Sunday. I'm so glad that I left my former school since everyone was incredibly fertile and there are currently three women pregnant and two on mat leave.

    I wish that I could have the same attitude about having a pg colleague. I could barely look at mine!

    Hmm, Vienna. Never made it Austria, but I hear that it's beautiful (like most of Europe, but I'm biased!).

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  4. I am so gla dthat you are in a place where you can be exceting and somewhat supportive of your co-workers pregnancy. I also think it is an excellent idea to live your life and let what may come come.

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  5. I had a tough time when my coworker in the neighboring cubicle was pregnant last year. The Monday after her surprise baby shower was especially difficult. It would have been nice to have an office with a door. Good luck getting through the next few months. You sound like you have a good attitude about it.

    And Vienna? Nice! I've never been there, but the pictures of the area like beautiful.

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  6. Oh wow, you are a stronger/nicer woman than I am! And go for it with the vacations! For me, one upside of infertility is that I get to take fabulous vacations! A few years ago we took a last-vacation-before-pregnancy .... then I realized things weren't going to happen as I thought they would. So now I try to take a couple of consolation vacations a year. whoo-hoo!

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  7. Hey there,
    I am actually not in Vienna, not even particularly close, but we wind up there at least once a year, and I have a bunch of friends there because I did an exchange semester during grad school in Austria - married a piefke anyway :) - we're still trying to work out our scheduling for the year - but we can definitely keep your dates in mind when planning. A meet-up might be doable! (BTW the kitchen with the metal backsplash from a few posts back - to die for, and I like the cabinets and the window in the tan house - something to work with.)

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  8. Taking vacations and not worrying about if you'll be pregnant is definitely a good idea. I think in the early years of TTC, most people try to plan trips and save vacation thinking about when they'd be pregnant. However if you're IF, then you'd never take any vacation or go anywhere.

    I hope you have fun in Vienna. My youngest brother just got back from a semester abroad just outside of Vienna. I'm very jealous since our one vacation this year will be surgery in Omaha.

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